August - 2016

Welcome!

I would like to welcome everyone to my new location. I am excited to continue my story right here! Let me give you a little of what is behind the name. I pondered for months, about what to call my site. I sent numerous name ideas to my name consultants, being shot down with each idea. Even the few I really liked. With the advice to "stop trying" and let it just come to you; BAM it happened. I looked down at my arm, where I have my life motto tattooed, "It's All Good!" For yea

So much . . .

Grab a Kleenex, or maybe a punching bag! In this read you might need one or the other.; in fact you just might need both. A few weeks back I was approached by a gentlemen that attends my church. He kindly said he wanted to bless me with a new roof on the Burger Den. It brought me to tears, that he would do this for me. Desperately in need I was of a new roof, and Rocky Mountain Exteriors did an amazing job on installing one for me. Thank you Todd for being so generous! I was

6 Months

So the 5th and 6th of each month seem to stick out in my heart. Although Doug passed on the 6th of November, the 5th was an extremely hard day. So as the 6 month mark came near, I could feel emotions building. So yesterday morning (the 5th) I jumped in my car and drove to Ogden to watch Z play softball. Alone for 4 hours as I drove, my mind wondered a bit and tears welled in my eyes. But as the sun beamed down on me I was reminded; although I feel as if I'm still in the middl

Happy Anniverary

Happy Anniverary

This week has been a rough one for me. These "firsts" hurt the most! March 26, 1993 I made the best decision of my life by becoming Douglas' wife. This anniversary will be the most difficult. As my heart is so broken, I remember the love that held it together for so many years. I'm sure the day will be filled with tears, but I will cherish the years I had him by my side. The one that no matter what had my back, believed in me, challenged me, supported me, and loved me on a le

So much to say

The other night as I was scrolling through Facebook, I came across KTVB's page. I usually read the headline and keep scrolling. That night was different. The headline read, "Clean MRI for pregnant mother of five with brain cancer." Was it the "clean MRI" that caught my attention, "brain cancer", or "pregnant mother of five". Either way, I felt drawn to open the article and read. As I read the tears began to well in my eyes. I knew the journey this family was just beginning to

What I miss

I jumped in the car after the basketball tournament my AAU team played in this past weekend. Grabbed my phone and realized I didn't have that one person to call. To say, "you wouldn't believe this team." "My girls played amazing!" Tears filled my eyes. Let's be real, and I am going to be very raw. These are the things I miss, and some things I seriously took for granted. See it was Douglas that would always answer my calls, "how was the game babe?" Followed with, "those girls

Good Bye 2015 . . . Hello 2016

I was asked the other day, Are you not so happy to see 2015 come to an end, wasn't it the worst year of your life? Quickly I responded, no not the worst year. I found that question to stir a lot of emotions in me. As I say good-bye to 2015 I have tears running down my face knowing it was the last year I had with the love of my life. Although 2015 taught me more lessons than I could have imagined. It taught me that if you stand firm and keep the faith, you will get your firs

A bit of hope

In the darkness of my grief, I am being given bits of hope put back in my heart. It seems to come to me just at the right time. My days are still filled with many tears, the pain I have feels as if it will never end, and my broken heart I have decided just might stay broken! But it is the acts of kindness that have brought me some hope in my journey. The Lord must put me on the hearts of many when he witnesses me in my sadness. Because it never fails, as I sit weeping my phon

Plan B

Plan B

I bought myself the sign in the photo. It seemed fitting to my journey. Realizing, that plan A is no longer the road I am traveling, I am trying to fit in to plan B. In time I know I will figure out how plan B is suppose to look, but for this moment as fitting as it is, I will say, I HATE PLAN B. I was very content in plan A. I wasn't alone in plan A. I had my best friend by my side. We had so many things we were going to do in plan A! I had chose plan A, never did I want pla

Dear Grieving Self

Dear Grieving self~ Yesterday we went to church, it was so refreshing to be in the house of The Lord. You did really well fighting back your tears. I want you to know, I am right here whenever you are ready. See I am giving you all the time you need to be in the pit of sadness. But I will tell you, in the depth of our sorrow, there is the sun that comes up each morning, there is a life to live, to do amazing things. I feel the hurt, the anguish, the complete sense of em

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